Blogmas - December 4, 2014

I gave myself a pedicure today.  In the grand scheme of things, this wasn't a big thing, but it made my day that much more awesome.  I had friends come by to take care of some yard work, and one took my car and brought it back ten times better than it was before.  I'm so grateful!  It's the little things that please me most.  Grand gestures are great and most often expected, but it's the little kindnesses and unexpected displays of friendship and Favor that blow me away.

I had so much on my list of things to do, but in the midst of it I looked down at my feet and decided that I needed a pedicure, so I dropped everything and did a self-spa day.  I had been in a rut.  Not feeling quite myself - that kind of "here-but-not-here" feeling.  I came out of it a few days ago when I did some sewing.  It never fails.  When I get in a funk the best thing for me to do is clean or create.  I chose to create the other day, and clean today (well, my feet anyway).

There is a lot to be said for pampering, even if it's self-pampering.  When I take the time to sit and give myself a pedi, I can't cook or clean or fold laundry at the same time.  It forces me to take a break.  I have to sit there and go through the process.  It had been over a month since my last pedi, so what a process it was! LOL!  But I enjoyed it.  I enjoyed the "me time".  It's something I've had to force myself to add to my routine.  With all the things on my "to-do" list, it's funny how doing me was not a priority. That's not good.

As a "Stay-At-Home-Mom", I love being there for my family, but I've learned that taking care of me first isn't being selfish, it's being responsible.  I can't be my best for my family if I'm not treating myself the best way I can.  I like to feel good in my skin.  Taking time to take care of my body puts me in a good mood.  And I think that spills over to my family.

Lesson learned.  

Blogmas - December 3, 2014

I used to work so hard at pleasing others and being "successful" but now I work hard at being me.  Being true to myself is what will reveal my purpose.  There's a reason I am the way I am.  There's a reason I get excited about art and dance and music and spirituality.  There's a reason I can cry my eyes out over some atrocity thousands of miles away, that will never really affect me.  There's a reason I want you to be happy and at peace, even if I don't know you personally.  That's how I'm shaped and it directly influences how I will impact the lives of others.  And I want to impact the lives of others. Directly or indirectly.  

I can't be true to me while following someone else's path.  God has a plan for me and I miss out if I am trying to grab at what's set aside for someone else.  The truth is, I don't want your blessing.  But I do want you to be blessed. I want my blessing, but not at your demise.

True success never comes from stepping on the backs of others and leaving them at the side of the road. I've never been ambitious.  I've never wanted to climb the corporate ladder. And I used to think something was wrong with me. I used to think I wasn't reaching my full potential.  Sure, I could have gone along that road, but it's not me.  I'm the woman who walks on the beach and is moved to tears at the majesty of the ocean.  I can sit and watch a tree and see its branches dance to the rhythm of God's breath.  I am a thinker, a worshipper, a lover of Life. 

I have the chance to explore a part of myself that I was too busy to acknowledge.  I'm digging deeper and finding that the discovery of who I am is a wonderful journey. Knowing myself is such a blessing.  There's no greater way to honor my Creator than to be the person He made me to be.

It's like peeling back petals of a flower and seeing color after color emerge.  I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and the more I learn, love and appreciate the One who made me, the more I learn, love and appreciate myself. 

The journey to self is never easy.  We wear so many masks and cloaks we often believe what we see reflected.  But to be willing to strip yourself away, layer by layer, is to be willing to be vulnerable to yourself. Not to anyone else.  We must love ourselves enough to tell ourselves the truth.

That's all for now.

Blessings...